Tony Awards Opening Number

I rarely watch television. It probably happens two or three times a year for something I think my kids would like to see like the Superbowl. In fact, we went for a few years without any channels, so we really got out of the habit. We have Netflix and watch DVDs, but that is about it.

A few nights ago, I got an email informing me that someone we know composed a medley for the opening number of the Tony Awards. This isn't too surprising because he is a famous composer that works on lots of movies and television shows. My kids are related to the composer, so I made sure that we watched. We were extra pleased to see that James Corden was hosting. His Carpool Karaoke cracks us up.

The opening number was amazing, so I thought I'd share it here:

The Truth About Cancer Series

Some years, like my last few, I feel like I kind of float through life. Nothing too terrible happens and nothing extraordinary blesses me either. That is how I have felt about my last couple of years. It hasn't been easy, but I am floating along and managing.

Honestly, that isn't how life goes all the time. Some years are full of life-changing/world defining experiences. Those things set you off on a different course. I am talking about positive experiences like getting married, having a baby, buying a house, moving across the country, having a religious awakening, taking an international trip as well as awful experiences like the death of a loved one, battling cancer, a horrific car accident, getting raped, etc.

For me, the years 2005 and 2006 were definitely life changing. 2005 started off with lots of promise. My husband (at the time) and I were house hunting. We found one that we liked and bought it. We also started going to a fertility specialist. We'd been married about 2 years and pregnancy was apparently not happening on its own. Right after we moved into our new house, my mother-in-law informed us that she was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. About a week or two later, I discovered that I was pregnant (during the testing process of fertility). About a week after that, I got a call from my sister informing me that my dad had terminal brain cancer that was extremely aggressive.

Talk about BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM. Of course, the joy of having a baby on the way definitely lessened the blow for me of the cancer news. I just kept thinking about the circle of life.

My dad passed away at the age of 56 when I was about 7 months pregnant. He suffered through numerous surgeries to remove multiple brain tumors along with chemo and radiation. He couldn't communicate when the tumors were taking over, so they would cut them out. That gave him about a week of talking before he shut down again. It got to the point where the surgeries were taking place every 2 weeks. I would definitely say it got fairly ridiculous. I finally called all 5 of my siblings and talked to them about just letting him be done with this life. It wasn't an easy conversation, but we are all religious and believe that much better things lie ahead for him. We were spread out over the US, but were able to visit him for Thanksgiving right after that decision had been made. He couldn't talk to us, but he definitely knew we were there. His eyes and hand squeezes said it all. When we headed home, he stopped eating and drinking. A week later, he was gone.

My mother-in-law lasted a year after her diagnoses. She also had surgeries, hospital stays, chemo, radiation, and all that. Our experiences with hospice and difficult decisions with my dad made it easier to navigate through her end of life. It was still heart wrenching, but we knew more about how it should be handled and what everything meant.

There are lots of lessons I learned from those experiences. One of them being that I didn't want to subject myself to all that cancer patients go through. If given a terminal cancer diagnoses, I would simply thank them and head home to live the best I could. I may do a surgery or two to remove huge tumors, but that would probably be it.

Since then, I definitely am interested in information on holistic methods of dealing with cancer and all that entails. Healthy eating, juicing, supplements, essential oils, reducing your toxic load, exercising,  ...Why not try?

This week, I have been enjoying the online series called the Truth About Cancer. So far, my favorite episodes were Day 2 (essential oils) & Day 3 (juicing). Obviously, those were things I already have an interest in. I do not buy everything they say hook, line & sinker, but there is definitely lots of tips and things to consider. When it is all over, I may type up a few things that I learned.

During the Day

My kids asked me what I do during the day when they are in school. They know I have a full time job, but they seem to think I'm lonely or bored or something. I decided to make a little video to show them. ☺

My 15 Year Old Self

This morning a friend on Facebook, that I've known in real life for decades that happens to be a lot younger than me (15+ years younger), posted a picture of herself when she was 15 years old. She wondered if her 15 year old self would approve of her so far. She married pretty young and has 3 sweet little kids. Her oldest is in kindergarten. Her husband has a good job and their house is quite nice. She felt pretty sure that her 15 year old self would be pleased. I smiled at the thought of her doing that and went on with my day.

About an hour ago, a mutual friend who happens to be somewhere in between our ages, followed in her footsteps. However, her life has been quite different. She also married young. In fact, she married her high school sweetheart, who turned out to be abusive to her and their kids. She is now re-married to a wonderful guy, but she is still dealing with the abusive ex's behavior towards the kids. I think it is safe to say that she feels she has been raked over the coals. Her conclusion was that her 15 year old self would be scared to death, but would be proud of her current self.

Because both of them did this little exercise, I wondered about my 15 year old self. It was quite a long time ago for me. I know that I thought I knew a lot more about life than I actually did. I pretty much knew everything. What a fun age! Well, I would NEVER have guessed that I would end up living in Texas, being divorced, being a single mom, having a career where I worked from home on my computer, and basically a million more things in life.

Even though life is a huge messy ball of twine, I am actually happier now than I was then. Mainly, that is because I simply crave independence. I couldn't wait to move out and be on my own. Now that I think about it, being a single mom is about the most independent you can be. I don't have to compromise or ever check with anyone about their opinions.

Many parts of life could be better. I always wanted kids, lots of kids. I feel blessed to have 2 amazing ones. They are a huge part of my happiness. Of course, I dreamed of my own knight-in-shining-armor who I would live happily ever after with. I still do. ..Maybe one day that will come true and I will even happily compromise on many things. My 15 year old self can just continue dreaming.      

Christmas Eve 2016

The holidays are starting off quite fun with family this year. My mom & step-dad came to town before Halloween. They are staying in an RV park about 20 minutes away. We have gone up to see my step-sister & her family several times. My sister came today.  She'll be here from Dec 24th until today (Jan 1st). We haven't been around family during the holidays for the last 4 years. It is especially nice to have my mom around to do a lot of the cooking.

This evening (Christmas Eve), we had a special dinner and talent show. Here our Santa place settings:

Then we had a talent show. I read the Night Before the Night Before Christmas, which is shorter than the Night Before Christmas. It is quite funny.

Lexi and Paige were next. They sung a song that Lexi wrote:

Jordan was next with the 12 days of Christmas. This is a song he LOVES to sing, especially when he is taking a bath:

My mom recited a clever poem about a boy that didn't believe in Santa.

My step-father wrapped it up with a song that Lexi & Paige helped a little with:



Finally, we opened our one present on Christmas Eve to find that it is always what we get the night before Christmas - our pjs.

Page 45 Says It All

Today, I came across something on the internet that said:

Pick Up the Book Nearest to You and Turn to Page 45. The first complete sentence describe your sex life.

I chuckled and thought, yeah right!  ...but I did it anyway even though there was a pile of books for youth. You can bet I was shocked how accurate this was.

Book 1: Aliens on Vacation by Clete Barrett Smith
Page 45: Oh no.  ** too true

I decided to try a few.

Book 2: The Vanishing Coin by Kate Egan
Page 45: He noticed the welcome mat again.  **not sure who "he" is & who might be welcomed again.

Book 3: The Giver by Lois Lowry
Page 45: But only one.   **very good advice

Book 4: Diary of a Wimpy Kid #8
Page 45: Ok, you know things are bad when even your little brother has more friends than you. **sad

Book 5: Elvis & Olive by Stephanie Watson
Page 45: Oops!  **Yes, I figured that out by now.

Book 6; Nancy Drew Diaries, Curse of the Arctic Star by Carolyn Keene
Page 45: She hit the button on the keyboard and grimaced.  *is this because I am avoiding online dating?

Well, there you have it. Perhaps the answer is to check out different books in the library.

Popular Body Types That Were "In"

I like this clip because it shows just how silly humans are when it comes to what looks beautiful or is "in."

Modern Chivalry

My dating life is about as boring as EVER.  ...yes, that means that I am NOT dating at all. If I ever find someone that peaks my interest, I'll definitely make time for him. However, checking out a million random guys in an effort to find a good date seems like a gigantic process with little reward. For now, I am leaving it up to destiny/fate/a PURE miracle or to a time when I change my mind about that.

The one thing that I have noticed over the (almost) 6 years as a single mom is that guys from the past like to make contact and catch up. I am beginning to believe that guys are more nostalgic than women and that they just might have better memories than we give them credit for (better than I do anyway). When it comes to this, Facebook has really changed the world. I would never have guessed that a guy I was casual friends with over 20 years ago would private message me to "catch up."

I am not sure what to make of it, but I have noticed their similarities:

1. None of them live anywhere near me (not even in this huge state of Texas or a surrounding state).
2. They are all on their second marriage.
3. They all had AWFUL first marriages - their ex-wive's fault of course.  They shared a few stories & I believe them.
4. They all seemed happy in their second marriage, but haven't bragged about their current wife.
5. They remember much more about me than I remember about them.
6. They considered us closer friends that I did.
7. They told me that they saw my picture and I still look the same/am beautiful.
8. They all told me that they had a crush or really liked me back in the day.
9. These catch-up sessions seem to last a few weeks and then taper off.

Only one or two suggested anything inappropriate. Mostly, they have been really respectful and genuinely kind. I am wondering if this is modern chivalry. They must know that divorce can blow self-esteem out of the water. I certainly don't fish for compliments or go out of my way to make it known that I am single. They probably notice that I use my maiden name.  This catching-up could be their good deed and a way for them to share their woes for a little therapy. I like to remind them to spoil their current wife.

Price of Shame

I haven't thought about Monica Lewinsky in a long time.  Then I saw this video below.  I am so glad to see that she seems to be rising above all that happened when she was so young.  At the time, I didn't really know what to think, but I truly felt sorry for all that she had to face and would face in the future.  Now, she is speaking up and has many good points.  Best quote, "Shame cannot survive empathy."  

Blind Devotion

What love really should be:

Happy Valentine's Day

I am still very single.  I can't even remember when my last date was, but I love Valentine's Day anyway.  I hope this day makes everyone smile because not all love is romantic.  It would be nice to be a special someone 's Valentine, but it is also nice to just be happy & loving.  

I made cute cards for my kids to take to school and decided to share them here.  

Too Much Drama

When your kids are driving you crazy, watch this video and remember - It could all be worse!

Very Superstitious

Have you ever looked up what the #1 song was when you were born?  You can do that here:

Birthday Song


Apparently, mine speaks volumes:  Supersition by Stevie Wonder

Sharing Birthdays

Today is my birthday and like most of my birthdays since my daughter was born, I don't feel like mine is that big of a deal.  Her birthday was 2 days ago.  I am so busy making it a great week for her that I'm birthdayed out when it is my turn.

I started planning her party a few weeks ago.  She wants to have some friends over to eat dinner and watch a movie.  She chose the Book of Life, so we have a Mexican theme.  I created an invitation and emailed it out.  We'll be making enchiladas. I still need to make decorations and get stuff for the party. I bought a few gifts for her last Saturday.

On Monday, her birthday, I picked up donuts for her class.  For lunch, she requested Carrabbas.  I ordered that online and took it to the school to eat with her.  That night, I made lasagna and steamed carrots for dinner.  My son took the picture below that evening. We had a good time.  Now, I am preparing for her party this Friday.  I enjoy all the excitement for her, but I have very little left over to devote to my own birthday.

As a single mom, it is easy for mine to get swept under the rug.  My kids wanted to buy presents for me, but that would mean I would have to take them shopping and give them money.  I can't really afford to do that.  They make me sweet little cards and notes instead.

Don't feel sad for me.  I am also overwhelmed by the heart-felt messages on Facebook.  I love all of that positive energy.  Quite a few friends called and stopped by with gifts.  My work even sent cupcakes.  One dear friend gave my kids each a dollar to go to bed early.  They actually were down by 6:30 and asleep by 7pm.  --Best gift EVER!

2015 New Years Resolutions

A strange thing happened last year.  I really started believing in the power of writing goals or desires of the heart down.  I have been doing it for years, so obviously I believed that there was merit in doing it.  Last year, I unexpectedly became a huge fan.

In the months following my divorce, I wrote a list of goals or desires that I wanted to happen in five years.  The list included 2 things that I didn't really know how to work on, so I didn't do anything about them. To be blunt, I hoped I could get the loans on my townhouse and vehicle in my name only (not with my ex).  I was working part-time and was making the payments all by myself often without child support, but I was sure I couldn't qualify for the loan by myself.  After writing it down, I went about life and didn't think about it again.

Last December, the transmission on my car went out.  I had just paid it off, but the title was in both of our names.  I pouted a few days, but then went to Car Max and got a cheaper used car, which I did qualify for ALL BY MYSELF.  I still didn't think about my goal until a month later, when I got a call from my mortgage company.  They told me that the government has a program to help people refinance.  I told them that I had gotten divorced and wasn't making very much money.  I didn't know if I could qualify.  They told me that I should try, so I went for it.  A few months later, the townhouse was only in my name.  I did nothing to seek those things out, but within 5 years they came to pass.  Coincidence?  Maybe...but I believe writing them sparked it all.

Now it is 2015, and I definitely want to document my resolutions.

1.  juice

I am going to juice more often (3 to 5 times a week).  Maybe even do a 3 day juice fast every month or two.  I love juicing, but I have gotten out of the habit.  Every time I need a little motivation, I am going to watch Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead - 1 or 2 (http://www.fatsickandnearlydead.com/).  Love those documentaries!

2. de-clutter my house 

For my entire life, I have never lived the the same house for long.  I have always moved with-in a year or two.  I have never had to spring clean or purge the junk that tends to accumulate.  My de-cluttering was basically about throwing stuff out that isn't worth moving.  I have now lived in this house for 3 1/2 years.  It completely surprises me that we could have so much extra stuff when I am very thrifty.  My goal is to figure out how to de-clutter when the goal isn't moving.  

3. pay off credit cards

Now that I am working full-time and life has started getting financially easier, I plan to reduce my debts and save more.  That is pretty straight forward.

4. lift others

I can't even count how many people have gone out of their way to help me through these last few years.  I am often shocked and humbled by their generosity and kindness.  I want to do help others the way they've helped me.  I started donating blood on a regular basis.  It happened because I felt like I didn't have anything to give, but I am healthy and realized that is one thing I could do.  I want to keep looking for ways to spread kindness.

5. teach essential oil classes

I have learned so much and there are quite a few people calling me and approaching me to ask questions.  People are really starting to take an interest in essential oils.  Our blog, Essential Health Solutions, is blowing up.  In a little over 2 months, it has had over 2,000 hits and it is picking up more readers all the time.  I see more and more people turning to essential oils.  My local grocery store has more than doubled their shelf space for essential oils and those brands aren't even safe to take internally or use topically. I see more and more people getting excited and wanting to learn more.


I think that is a pretty good list.  I would like to think that sharing it makes me more accountable.  I have a few other more personal things listed in a notebook.  I guess those are more dreams/wishes.  For some reason, I feel like sharing those kinds of things that I have less control over will jinx them like a birthday wish.

Cheers to you all!  Happy New Year and may life take you where you need and want to go!

Happy Thanksgiving 2014

We are spending the day with some friends that have a girl Lexi's age and a boy Jordan's age. I'm making rolls, pumpkin pie, and green bean casserole.  We might head over to spend time with old friends this evening and eat more pie (like I need more dessert).

Hope this day is full of amazing memory making moments and love for everyone.

Happy Thanksgiving!   

Better as an Old Friend

I have lived in this town several times in my life.  The first time my family moved here, I was only 16.  I had a whole year of high school here and made quite a few friends that I am still close to.  At least a handful of friends fit into this category. I love them dearly along with their spouses, kids and parents.  We go through phases where we see each other quite often and talk on the phone.  Then we'll go through phases where we don't communicate very much for a few weeks or months.  I have already put in the time and effort with my old friends so we can pick up right where we left off.  It is comfortable and we know each other's history.  I love sharing life with them.  I love knowing where they came from and seeing the progress and how well they handle the trials in life.  When we talk, they know that I am not that strange or only what I am right now.  They can see phases in life or why I am the way I am.

I also have other friends that I made during that time period that I am not really close with (mostly old church friends), but that I am thrilled to run into around town.  It is fun to catch up and even share an occasional activity.  Both types of these long term friends hold a special place in my heart and I feel like I am good at being their friend.  

On the other hand, we've lived here (this time) for the past 3 1/2 years and I've made quite a few new friends.  I think they are wonderful and I like them a lot, but I just don't feel like I am able to be a good friend to them.  At first, I wondered if it is because I feel so deeply for my old friends that it is strange to like the new ones.  It actually took a while for me to realize that some of the new people I spend time with are actually "friends." Now that I see that, I understand that relationships just take work.  

Sadly, I am stretched too thin as it is. In order to develop a friendship, it takes time and effort. The new friends want to talk more and hang out several times a week. I feel like I am being a little rude because I am just too busy.  Whenever we talk on a deeper level, it turns into a whole long conversation explaining the back story.  I don't mind sharing or listening, but it really isn't as easy as it is with my old friends.  Many of them are fairly new to this area and they are wanting to find people to do things with.  That is also difficult for me because I don't have money for extra things like going to lunch.  I also work full time and many of them are stay-at-home moms.  

I feel very fortunate to have so many wonderful people in my life.  I just hope that I am not failing them or making them feel like I don't care.    

Alex Boye - Shake It Off

Taylor Swift's song - Shake It Off is really catchy, but I like this version much better.  

Halloween 2014

Lexi and Jordan dressed up last weekend for a Trunk-or-Treat party.  This year, our theme is circus.  She is a 3-Ring Master and he is a Strong Man/Lion Tamer.  I had planned to be a Fortune Teller, but this has been a hectic month.  Plus, after sewing Lexi's skirt at the beginning of the month, I realized I was done with sewing for a while.  My plan was to make a black peasant top to match her skirt, but life marches on too quickly.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN! 

Being a Single Mom

People often say to me, "it must be so difficult being a single mom" or something close to that.  I usually say that it is a lot easier than being married was.  Of course, I feel like my divorce was about kicking the frat boy out of the house.  To be fair, he did contribute financially and helped around the house.  He was great at organizing and cleaning the garage.  In fact, he has done it a hand-full of times in the last few years.  He just loves doing it and he doesn't have a garage of his own.

Like most women, I did most of the housework, child care, shopping, and errands.  None of that changed because of the divorce, which by the way was 5 years ago (can you believe it?).  There has been a few downsides though, including:

1. I guess the biggest impact has been financial.  I'm not getting a lot of child support. I chose to have the amount lowered because I knew he would struggle.  He tends to go through at least a couple of weeks of unemployment every year, so I don't always get it either.  At least, he has good intentions.  

2.The second biggest impact has been house repair things.  He is a fairly handy person and he knew a lot of people who can do some of the things he couldn't.  I never had to worry about those issues.  My house is only 8 years old, but little things tend to need repairs like the faucet on my kitchen sink or cheap light fixtures that had to be replaced.  My ex still helps me with some things, but sometimes I have to wait months until he gets around to it.  I have a home warranty so appliances and my a/c are covered.  My step-father and mom come for a month in the winter so they help with a few things.  When my brother visited, he also did quite a bit.  

3. The third thing I have noticed is the problems that come up that are a bit overwhelming.  It would be nice to share the impact with someone else.  Like last December, the transmission on my car was breaking down.  I had just paid off the car and was excited to keep it another 5 years.  Sadly, I didn't have $5k to fix it.  Those kinds of problems remind me that I am all alone in this, which isn't fun.

It isn't all bad though.  The last few weeks, I have heard quite a few comments that has me thinking that there are a lot of controlling spouses out there.  One friend said, "My husband would never let me buy that."  It was only a $30 item and they are not struggling at all.  A friend of a friend said, "My husband keeps the thermostat in our house at 78 degrees so I am used to being hot."  Both times I managed to politely smile while biting my tongue.  Another friend told me about her sister-in-law that seems like a nightmare of a wife.  Marriage is tough. 

Fortunately, I am an extremely independent person.  I think that makes being a single mom much easier.  I like making all the decisions on my own.  I can compromise, but isn't it nice when you don't have to? All the money, even though there isn't much, can be spent on things that I think are important.  Activities and vacations are all decided by me.  I don't have to watch a movie, tv show, sporting event, or even do something that doesn't seem worth it to me.  Most of what I do revolves around the kids, but that is what I choose.  I have realized that this is the perfect time to appreciate my independence.  So what if I haven't been on a date in years?  I can't afford a babysitter anyway.  ☺