Decorating Pumpkins

This year, I decided that I didn't feel like carving pumpkins.  Actually, I should say this week has been crazy hectic with work.  I barely survived getting by on minimal activities and very little sleep.  However, holidays must go on, right?  I decided that we should do some kind of pumpkin decorating activity one evening.  I pulled out my hot glue gun and bin full of ribbons and this is what we came up with.  The kids picked out the ribbons for their pumpkins.  Jordan wanted bats and spiders.  Lexi wanted skulls and polka-dots.  We used these as our decorations for trunk-or-treat.  Maybe next year things will be a little easier and we can go all out. 

Zillions of Distractions

I think it is no secret, especially to anyone who has read my blog for several years, that I simply ♥LOVE♥ holidays.  Remember the old days when I used to re-design my blog for each one?  Pretty crazy!  My blog got too much attention in those days and now sadly has been quite neglected.  These last six weeks it is mainly because of Pinterest.  Who doesn't love looking at, pinning and getting zillions of great ideas about everything and anything?   Of course, I have been looking at lots of holiday ideas.  It is just too tempting for me.  If you are into it or looking for a new addiction, check it out.  I think you can follow me using frecklefacegirl01@hotmail.com or my facebook connection.  The more connections we make, the more stuff there is to look at...  shiny, interesting, crafty, fashionable, dreamy, silly stuff.

Tonight, I have been looking at faces that are painted up for day of the dead.  I have been interested in doing that to my face for Halloween for several years.  I even watched a tutorial.  I don't think it will happen this year, but definitely a motivation for next Halloween.   

Americans Can Cook

Every afternoon (3:30 pm), Jordan and I stand outside of Lexi’s school to pick her up. There are four moms at that exit that walk their kids home on a daily basis, so we have casually talked every day for the past six weeks. For some strange reason, I am the only US born mom and consequently the only one without an accent. One is from France. One is from Venezuela. The third one is from Bolivia.

Last week, the one from France brought each of us a bundle of fresh basil from her garden. The next day, they were all curious about how we each used our basil. The French one’s father was a chef, so she regularly cooks with fresh basil. The one from Venezuela teaches gourmet cooking classes for parties at people’s homes. She planned to use her basil for one of the parties. The one from Bolivia was still thinking about how she would use it, but had thought about using it in a cream cheese mix for various different things. They all looked at me with curiosity. I told them I was going to make a homemade margherita pizza (posted a picture above as proof). They were surprised that I knew how to cook since I am an “American.”

Isn’t that funny that they thought that? Is it because Americans eat out a lot? Maybe they just think we stick to meat and potatoes, which I know a lot who do. I happen to be better at foreign dishes. To be honest, I love all things Italian. Indian, Arabic and Japanese rank high on my list of dishes too. We hardly ever go out to eat, so I have to keep it interesting. I don’t know how Americans got that reputation or if it is wide-spread, but perhaps it is time we show them that we can cook.

Contemplating Complete Forgiveness

I have something I have been thinking about posting for several weeks, but I am not sure how much I am ready to reveal or honestly even deal with. One thing I know is that I don’t want to spell it out, but I think it will be completely obvious who this is about. Never-the-less, here it goes…

What happens when there is someone who plays a significant role in your life that over the course of several years gets wrapped up in something that drastically hurts themselves, you and definitely damages your relationship? What happens when this builds to the point where most of the ties must be severed in order to keep your sanity? What if you take time to at least generally forgive the person and are able to talk to them in an honest and kind way? What if after a certain amount of time, they ask for complete forgiveness and would like to TRY to restore that relationship? Not only that, but they are showing remarkable improvement through the help of a therapist and religious studies. What if that person is going out of their way to prove they are an asset in your life without expecting anything in return?

These are the basic questions I have been contemplating for the past few weeks. In general, I believe that I am a very forgiving person that doesn’t hold grudges. I honestly believe that everyone deserves a second chance if they are willing to work for it. Sadly, we are all foolish at times and take things for granted. I wish I could say that I am perfect. Sometimes, we get our best lessons in life by learning the hard way. Those lessons transform us into a much better person.

On the other hand, there is that saying - fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. There is a certain amount of distrust and self protection that exists to help us survive. Where is the balance in all of this? I guess it is just a matter of taking things VERY slowly and seeing if it is possible to build enough trust. Life is so complicated.

Burning Up

It is certainly time to pray for some REAL rain for Texas. We are burning up. I am glad that I live in an area where there isn't an active fire. However, we have fires to the west of us and fires to the north. Sadly, there are choking clouds of smoke everywhere. I am tired of smelling and breathing it.  We even had ashes falling around our house on Monday evening.  The weather has finally gotten a little cooler and now the smoke forces us to stay inside.

On Sunday, my son started announcing to people that a hurricane is coming. I don't know why.  We hadn’t been discussing it or anything. I am simply hoping for a very wet tropical storm, one that lingers for several days and soaks everything.

Divorce Talk

A few weeks ago, I realized that so many of my posts focus on divorce and being single. Not that it is a bad topic, but I decided that I was a bit tired of the whole thing. I wanted to mix it up a little.

However, the bizarre thing about this status is that somehow it inspires people to open up and share their marriage struggles and thoughts of divorce. Plus, meeting other divorcees happens naturally. I end up hearing and talking a lot about the whole divorcee way of life. While it is quite interesting and really opens my eyes up to how fortunate I truly am, I wonder what the deeper meaning in all of this. Life is so complicated with a million different answers and directions as well as insane reasoning behind decisions and feelings.

When it comes to others, mainly I just listen without judging. I believe it is important to look at situations from diverse angles and consider all options. I bring up many different points good and bad without stating my opinion. Ultimately, relationships are so personal that only each individual can figure out what they truly want to do or are ready to do.

Through all these various discussions, I have realized that only the most fortunate people survive a divorce with a relatively small amount of money being paid to lawyers, without hateful feelings, and being able to maintain a friendship not to mention mutual respect. Life is far from easy and divorce is horrible, but I consider myself a rare lucky divorcee.

First Day of School 2011

Lexi's first day of kindergarten was yesterday. She was quite excited about it and had a great day.  I had no doubts that it would be good.  Both she and I were more than ready for this day.  The only one that got a little emotional was Jordan and that was back at home when he was missing her. 

 

Lexi's Reading Lessons

We finally finished Lexi's 100th reading lesson. Remember back in November when I posted her 55th reading lesson? Well, we got up to 74 and stalled. I had too much work and it was quite grueling to keep her focused and interested. The lessons went out the window. When we got back to Texas, Lexi’s friend (daughter of my friend) was close to finishing the 100 lessons. That gave Lexi the motivation she needed to nag me to do them.

I decided the best way to do it would be to start over again. We finished the first 20 lessons in one afternoon. Getting up to the first 50 lessons went quickly. Lexi remembered all of the sounds and sped through them. After that, we rarely did more than one lesson a day, but we kept up with it. We both really wanted to finish before school starts. Also, she has been excited for the ice cream party that I promised her from the beginning.

Kids Talk

Today is the two year anniversary of the divorce. Emotionally, I am in a much better place and so is my ex. I know it was absolutely the right decision, even though breaking up a family is so difficult and shouldn’t have to happen ever. However, life has a way of helping people grow, heal and move on.

This week, I saw an article about dealing with your ex getting a new girlfriend. One of the author’s suggestions was encouraging your kids not to talk about the other parent’s life or your life. I think that advice is sad.

First of all, I can’t imagine discouraging my kids from sharing anything that affects their lives. I want them to feel like they can talk to me about anything and everything. Perhaps, that is one of the reasons my kids are non-stop talkers. I don’t want them to keep things from me. I hope by getting in this habit, they’ll come to me with everything especially during the teenage years or if anyone ever does anything to them that I NEED to know about.

Secondly, I don’t want them to feel guilty or bad about a person that is hopefully a positive influence in their lives. I wouldn’t discourage them from talking about their teachers or friends’ moms. Their dad’s girlfriend or their step-mom would be a significant part of their lives, especially since they spend every other weekend with him and most likely her.

Thirdly, kids are constantly trying to understand the world and life. Every new situation creates questions. They want to understand what things mean and how things work, especially relationships. Questions like: What will happen if they get married? What if they have a baby? How will that baby be related to me? Will that baby be related to you, mom? Will my dad still love me? Etc. Kids naturally ask questions and probably feel more comfortable asking the person who answers most of their questions, which in my experience is their mom.

I guess this point in the article struck a nerve because I am dealing with this currently. My ex has a special woman in his life that the kids spend time with. In fact, most of the time they are with him, she is too. I haven’t met her yet, but she seems like a great person and is really getting attached to the kids. I am sure that she is good for him and the kids. Since my kids are TALKERS, I have heard all about her and him and them and answered all kinds of questions. Sure, it sometimes causes moments of insecurity or self-doubt (when I think about it later after they are asleep), but overall I feel like it is a positive thing.

Then again, I am able to listen and answer from an emotionally stable place and with a level head. My point is that advice columns can be wrong. Before taking advice, think about it from all different angles and potential outcomes.

Lack of Television Obsession

My life seems to revolve around taking care of the kids, work, cleaning the house, cooking and a little sleep. Even my social life has more to do with entertaining the kids than simply being me time. Fortunately, I get to hang out with friends that have kids that are friends with my kids. So, I kill two birds with one stone. I love that. One thing, this current lifestyle leads to is the lack of opportunity to indulge in television watching. That means I should to stick to quality programs when I get the rare moment.

When I was in California, I caught a few episodes of Glee, Bones, Lie To Me, and a few others that I quite liked. However, I always end up missing most of the episodes in a season even if I think the show is amazing. This tendency helped lead to my decision to not get cable. Instead, we have a Wii so we can watch Netflix. I also watch on my computer.  If I have time for a movie, I mostly like cheesy chic flicks. I try to watch one when the kids are out with their dad when I am not terribly busy working.

Somehow, while searching for something interesting but not so long, I stumbled across a tv show that sounded very out of the ordinary. It is called Obsessed. It is a reality show, but not the staged contest kind that I dislike. It is more like a documentary. I have only watched about 4 episodes, but it is fascinating. Actually, it is fascinating, creepy, desperately sad, completely insane, and then full of hope and moving on. Each episode is about two different people living with extreme cases of OCD. They discuss and document their issues and then go through 12 weeks of face-your-fears type of therapy.

I have always enjoyed biographies and real life stories, especially ones where people open up and lay it all on the line. Not only are these people sharing the darkest part of their lives, but they are finding manageable solutions to something that has plagued them for years. Although, I am easy going and can’t see any real similarities to their problems, it is inspiring to watch them tackle an issue head-on and then transform.