My 15 Year Old Self

This morning a friend on Facebook, that I've known in real life for decades that happens to be a lot younger than me (15+ years younger), posted a picture of herself when she was 15 years old. She wondered if her 15 year old self would approve of her so far. She married pretty young and has 3 sweet little kids. Her oldest is in kindergarten. Her husband has a good job and their house is quite nice. She felt pretty sure that her 15 year old self would be pleased. I smiled at the thought of her doing that and went on with my day.

About an hour ago, a mutual friend who happens to be somewhere in between our ages, followed in her footsteps. However, her life has been quite different. She also married young. In fact, she married her high school sweetheart, who turned out to be abusive to her and their kids. She is now re-married to a wonderful guy, but she is still dealing with the abusive ex's behavior towards the kids. I think it is safe to say that she feels she has been raked over the coals. Her conclusion was that her 15 year old self would be scared to death, but would be proud of her current self.

Because both of them did this little exercise, I wondered about my 15 year old self. It was quite a long time ago for me. I know that I thought I knew a lot more about life than I actually did. I pretty much knew everything. What a fun age! Well, I would NEVER have guessed that I would end up living in Texas, being divorced, being a single mom, having a career where I worked from home on my computer, and basically a million more things in life.

Even though life is a huge messy ball of twine, I am actually happier now than I was then. Mainly, that is because I simply crave independence. I couldn't wait to move out and be on my own. Now that I think about it, being a single mom is about the most independent you can be. I don't have to compromise or ever check with anyone about their opinions.

Many parts of life could be better. I always wanted kids, lots of kids. I feel blessed to have 2 amazing ones. They are a huge part of my happiness. Of course, I dreamed of my own knight-in-shining-armor who I would live happily ever after with. I still do. ..Maybe one day that will come true and I will even happily compromise on many things. My 15 year old self can just continue dreaming.      

Christmas Eve 2016

The holidays are starting off quite fun with family this year. My mom & step-dad came to town before Halloween. They are staying in an RV park about 20 minutes away. We have gone up to see my step-sister & her family several times. My sister came today.  She'll be here from Dec 24th until today (Jan 1st). We haven't been around family during the holidays for the last 4 years. It is especially nice to have my mom around to do a lot of the cooking.

This evening (Christmas Eve), we had a special dinner and talent show. Here our Santa place settings:

Then we had a talent show. I read the Night Before the Night Before Christmas, which is shorter than the Night Before Christmas. It is quite funny.

Lexi and Paige were next. They sung a song that Lexi wrote:

Jordan was next with the 12 days of Christmas. This is a song he LOVES to sing, especially when he is taking a bath:

My mom recited a clever poem about a boy that didn't believe in Santa.

My step-father wrapped it up with a song that Lexi & Paige helped a little with:



Finally, we opened our one present on Christmas Eve to find that it is always what we get the night before Christmas - our pjs.

Page 45 Says It All

Today, I came across something on the internet that said:

Pick Up the Book Nearest to You and Turn to Page 45. The first complete sentence describe your sex life.

I chuckled and thought, yeah right!  ...but I did it anyway even though there was a pile of books for youth. You can bet I was shocked how accurate this was.

Book 1: Aliens on Vacation by Clete Barrett Smith
Page 45: Oh no.  ** too true

I decided to try a few.

Book 2: The Vanishing Coin by Kate Egan
Page 45: He noticed the welcome mat again.  **not sure who "he" is & who might be welcomed again.

Book 3: The Giver by Lois Lowry
Page 45: But only one.   **very good advice

Book 4: Diary of a Wimpy Kid #8
Page 45: Ok, you know things are bad when even your little brother has more friends than you. **sad

Book 5: Elvis & Olive by Stephanie Watson
Page 45: Oops!  **Yes, I figured that out by now.

Book 6; Nancy Drew Diaries, Curse of the Arctic Star by Carolyn Keene
Page 45: She hit the button on the keyboard and grimaced.  *is this because I am avoiding online dating?

Well, there you have it. Perhaps the answer is to check out different books in the library.

Popular Body Types That Were "In"

I like this clip because it shows just how silly humans are when it comes to what looks beautiful or is "in."

Modern Chivalry

My dating life is about as boring as EVER.  ...yes, that means that I am NOT dating at all. If I ever find someone that peaks my interest, I'll definitely make time for him. However, checking out a million random guys in an effort to find a good date seems like a gigantic process with little reward. For now, I am leaving it up to destiny/fate/a PURE miracle or to a time when I change my mind about that.

The one thing that I have noticed over the (almost) 6 years as a single mom is that guys from the past like to make contact and catch up. I am beginning to believe that guys are more nostalgic than women and that they just might have better memories than we give them credit for (better than I do anyway). When it comes to this, Facebook has really changed the world. I would never have guessed that a guy I was casual friends with over 20 years ago would private message me to "catch up."

I am not sure what to make of it, but I have noticed their similarities:

1. None of them live anywhere near me (not even in this huge state of Texas or a surrounding state).
2. They are all on their second marriage.
3. They all had AWFUL first marriages - their ex-wive's fault of course.  They shared a few stories & I believe them.
4. They all seemed happy in their second marriage, but haven't bragged about their current wife.
5. They remember much more about me than I remember about them.
6. They considered us closer friends that I did.
7. They told me that they saw my picture and I still look the same/am beautiful.
8. They all told me that they had a crush or really liked me back in the day.
9. These catch-up sessions seem to last a few weeks and then taper off.

Only one or two suggested anything inappropriate. Mostly, they have been really respectful and genuinely kind. I am wondering if this is modern chivalry. They must know that divorce can blow self-esteem out of the water. I certainly don't fish for compliments or go out of my way to make it known that I am single. They probably notice that I use my maiden name.  This catching-up could be their good deed and a way for them to share their woes for a little therapy. I like to remind them to spoil their current wife.

Price of Shame

I haven't thought about Monica Lewinsky in a long time.  Then I saw this video below.  I am so glad to see that she seems to be rising above all that happened when she was so young.  At the time, I didn't really know what to think, but I truly felt sorry for all that she had to face and would face in the future.  Now, she is speaking up and has many good points.  Best quote, "Shame cannot survive empathy."  

Blind Devotion

What love really should be:

Happy Valentine's Day

I am still very single.  I can't even remember when my last date was, but I love Valentine's Day anyway.  I hope this day makes everyone smile because not all love is romantic.  It would be nice to be a special someone 's Valentine, but it is also nice to just be happy & loving.  

I made cute cards for my kids to take to school and decided to share them here.  

Too Much Drama

When your kids are driving you crazy, watch this video and remember - It could all be worse!

Very Superstitious

Have you ever looked up what the #1 song was when you were born?  You can do that here:

Birthday Song


Apparently, mine speaks volumes:  Supersition by Stevie Wonder