Excuse #2 for Not Dating

Excuse #2:

California is just a pit stop in my life.  Ok, so it is two years in limbo land.  I don't plan to stay here and really have no desire to make strong ties with anyone.  I realize that two years is a long time for a pit stop, but there it is...  I see it as temporary.

Along that note - This morning, I got a call from my tenant in Texas.  They are looking for a house and would like to know if I would be willing to let them out of their lease early (6 months left).  I would LOVE to, but the timing isn't right at all for me.  I am sure that my company isn’t ready to talk about full time yet.  I want it & they want it.  How torturous is that? 

Excuse #1 for Not Dating

Recently, I have become friends with a few people that are single parents.  While part of me completely loves this status more than I should, I also recognize that there is a small amount of loneliness in always being surrounded by two beautiful kids and not having someone to truly share our lives with.  I just can't seem to get excited about dating though.  I tried it for a few months about a year ago and decided to hold off.  Lately, I feel the need to explore my reasoning.  I plan to post some of my excuses (lame or not) over the next few days. 

Excuse #1:

When you have kids, anything that isn't a great date is just a huge waste of time.  I would much rather spend that time with my kids.  Let's face it; most dates are just not worth it when you have something better to do.  Being a mom means that I ALWAYS have something better going on.   

My Dad's Brother Died

My dad's brother died this week.  I am not really sad, but I am in shock.  It has been five years since my dad passed away and I can't believe his parents are burying another child.  Both of their sons are gone now.  I think losing a child is the most horrible thing ever, no matter how old you are.  Here is his obit (minus some details):

Lloyd, 62, died Monday, Jan. 3, 2011, due to complications from pneumonia.  Services will be held on Saturday, Jan. 8.  Burial with military honors will follow at the cemetery.

He was born in Logan, Utah, on April 9, 1948, and was the oldest child of Maurice and JoAnn.  He graduated from Kuna High School.

He served as a sergeant in the Vietnam War from 1968 to 1970 and was honorably discharged. He was awarded the Purple Heart and Bronze Star for his service.

Lloyd will be remembered for his passion for his cows, horses, dogs and grandchildren. His lifelong dream was to be a rancher, which he was through and through.

He had a great sense of humor and was always teasing everyone.

He is survived by his wife, four children, and his 8 grandchildren. He is also survived by his parents and his sisters.  He was preceded in death by his brother, Larry.

Bracing for the New Year

Isn’t it odd that many of us seem to spend the first week or two of each New Year bracing to see what it will bring? We are a bit nervous about whether or not it will be a good year. If last year was particularly rough, we hope and pray that this one will be a huge improvement. If we had a great year, we are extremely anxious that the pendulum will swing the other way. Lots of people, who claim not to be overly superstitious, look for little signs that will give clues as to what’s to come. It is almost humorous that the changing of a number such as 2011 (simply mankind’s way of keeping track) causes numerous emotions.

To be honest, I can’t remember having one year that I would deem as “bad.” Sure there were years when it seemed like lots of things hit hard, but in those years good things happened too. Sometimes the good and bad things carried over into the following year. Life seems to be more of a crazy mixed up ball of uncertainty that does not pay attention to a silly thing like what month or year it happens to be. However, outward randomness is not necessarily a negative thing. At least it is always interesting.

I am not sure where I am going with this. This little post is probably just a pep talk I am trying to give myself. I am trying not to view the negative occurrences that have recently happened as signs of what is to come. It all started one day, last month. I suddenly had a feeling of dread come over me. I felt like something terrifying is going to happen, but that in the end everything would turn out better than it is now. I have no idea what this means or when it will happen.

I would like to believe it has something to do with my ex being laid off last week. Sure I will not get child support for a while, but then maybe he’ll get a better job and be able to move on with his life. Even better, perhaps it means I’ll meet Mr. Wonderful and I’ll be extremely nervous about the new feelings. Beyond those two, I start to really dread what could be coming my way. With all my heart, I hope it isn’t that my company decides they don’t have enough work to keep me employed. I haven’t exactly been busy for the last few months. Plus, I desperately hope they can put me on full-time in the late summer so that my Texas plans will be a reality.

Despite the fact that being nervous is just a useless waste of energy, I am still bracing for whatever may come my way. Please be mostly kind…2011.

Happy New Year & Goodbye Shopping!

It is that time of year again, when many people make resolutions. I always like to spend at least a few moments to review the previous year, think about the upcoming year, and re-set my priorities. This year, I don’t have much to rehash, but I am looking forward to possible big changes this summer.

I am planning to move back to my house in Texas. Now, I wish I knew how or if it will all work out, but that is my plan. My tenant’s lease ends on July 31st. I would really like to get Lexi enrolled in kindergarten there, which starts the middle of August. My dream/ideal situation is for my company to put me back on full-time in September. I can enroll Jordan in the same place that Lexi was going before we left. He would start right after Labor Day. Sounds like a great plan, but I know life often takes us in different directions. I still really want this one though.

While my company is doing ok, the economy in Florida has been suffering. There are not a lot of contracts out there. I am desperately praying we win one so that they don’t have to worry as much about agreeing to the full-time. My other option is to look for a job, but I am hoping I don’t have to go that route.

In order to make this transition easier, I realize that I am going to need money. Most situations in life are easier with money, right? Knowing that, I have decided that it is time to become an extreme penny pincher. I have never been very good at it, but I am certainly going to try.

So, here is to a New Year of penny pinching for the greater good!

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas from our family to yours! I just love this time of year.  Spending time with family and a general sense of cheer just make life seem a bit better. 

We don't have anything too exciting planned this year. Unlike last year, no family members are coming to stay. Since we're living with family, we still get the benefit of spending the holidays with loved ones.  We have also tried to help a few people who are less fortunate than we are this year. 

I had planned to hold back on shopping, but as usual I kept finding things that I knew Lexi and Jordan would love. On top of that, my sister and mom enjoyed getting things for them. They will be very spoiled come Christmas morning. It will certainly be fun seeing their excitement.

Holiday Cheer

I took the kids with me to the post office this morning to send off a few packages. As expected, the line was out the door and there were only two clerks.  I had prepared Lexi and Jordan as well as myself for the long line.  We didn't mind so much, but everyone else was grumpy and complaining loudly. 

After about 15 minutes of waiting, Jordan started singing, "We wish you a Merry Christmas!"  He sang it fairly loud and quite cheerfully.  Quite a few people around us cracked a smile.  It reminded me that "the best way to spread holiday cheer is singing loud for all to hear." Thanks Buddy the Elf.

San Diego Snow

Lexi and Jordan just love snow, pretty much like all kids, especially ones that rarely get to experience it.  Today, in fact, Jordan saw a snowball fight on television and was very excited to have one.  I had to explain that we would not be having one today.  He was quite sad and questioned why.  Well... I explained that we don't have any snow and the temperature actually made it all the way to 80 degrees.  In stead, we made snow flakes to hang up. 

Now He is Three

Jordan's birthday was yesterday.  He is actually three now.  The funny thing is that every day he jumps on the scale and ranges between 31 and 33.  Whenever I tell him his weight, he would turn to be and say "No, I am two!"  Yesterday though, he was 31.4.  He said, "Yeah, I AM 31." 

Favorite Black Friday Activity

Last night, I decided to give shopping on Black Friday a try.  I had done it once before back when I was married and we went to spend Thanksgiving with his Grandma, Aunt and cousins.  His three cousins are all girls about my age and they love to go to Kohls every year.  We got up early and got there about 4 or 5 am, whenever it opened that year and were able to go right in.  We were able to get one cart and we would take turns standing in line while the rest of us would gather items.  Later, we went to Panera Bread for breakfast.  It was actually quite fun.

Sadly, my experience this year was nothing like that. First, I decided to go to Toys-R-Us at 10pm when they opened. Second, I couldn't get anyone to go with me. My mom and sister are still suffering from jet lag from their trip to Egypt and have been going to bed around 7:30 or 8pm every night. I probably should have picked Walmart at 5 or 6am and they would have been up for it.

I arrived at Toys-R-Us right at opening time to find an overly crowded parking lot and a line that wrapped around the entire building. In fact, the end of the line was directly in front of the door. I had to follow it all the way around. The first half of the circle went rather quickly, which gave me false hope. That was when they let in the first 300. Then about every 15 minutes, we moved up in line. They were letting 50 people in every time 50 had left. I kept waiting thinking that it couldn't take THAT long. Plus, Jordan's birthday was on my mind (Dec 1st). I thought that this was a good opportunity for me to shop for the kids without them. It ended up taking exactly two hours to get in the front door. I was still optimistic at that point. It was only midnight. I decided to grab a few things as well as a gift for Jordan and head home. As I was winding through the store, I noticed the extremely long line for the registers. I couldn't believe it, so I asked how long it was taking. I was told about an hour and a half to two hours. That is when I put my stuff down and headed right home, because I knew I was defeated.

From these experiences, I have learned that going with a fun group and making it more of a social outing is the only way that Black Friday should even be considered (for me anyway). From now on, I'll save my shopping for less busy times.

This brings me to my usual Black Friday activity, which is working on Christmas cards. I just love sending them out at the beginning of December. I planned to work on them today, but Lexi was also excited about making cards this year. I helped her make some for her friends. I'll have to start working on mine tomorrow. If any of the regular blog readers want to get on my list, just send me your contact info at: frecklefacegirl01@hotmail.com.