National Cemeteries

Veterans Day evokes a lot of national pride for most citizens of the US and reminds us to be thankful to the soldiers that fought for our freedoms.  For me, National Cemeteries really bring that reverence home.  My mother and grandmother (her mother) have instilled in me a general appreciation for cemeteries.   We used to spend Memorial Days driving around to various cemeteries to drop flowers off at the graves of deceased loved ones. 

It wasn't until 2005 that I grew to have an additional appreciation for National Cemeteries.  That was the year that my dad passed away and was laid to rest in the Houston National Cemetery.  The grounds and ceremonies are an amazing tribute to the soldiers.  I have also visited the National Cemeteries in Arlington and South Florida.  They are all impressive and humbling. 

Several weeks ago, I started thinking about when I took my kids to visit my dad's grave in December of 2008, which was three years after he died.  If we were living there, we would definitely go this year too.  I think it is a tradition that I will start as soon as we move back.  What a wonderful way to kick off the month of December and also teach my kids a great lesson in life.  Here is a photo I took then:

Values Wheel

The other day, I read a magazine during my warm-up at the gym that had interesting advice.  A psychologist was trying to explain to women how they can determine if I guy is relationship worthy.  I agree that women can get twitterpated & forget the important things when it comes to love.  She suggested that women should sit down and draw two circles, one inside the other. 

In the inner circle, there should be a list of things she absolutely can't live without in a relationship.  If a guy has the qualities in the inner circle and there are lots of mutual romantic feelings, he is relationship worthy.  The outer circle should be a list of things that would be nice or a bonus.  I think mainly that outer list is there because women like to give a guy they like the benefit of the doubt.  It may be a way of acknowledging things that you like, but don't NEED. 

I decided to make a Values Wheel.  I came up with a few things for the inner & outer circles:

I actually think the outer circle should be created once you have someone you are thinking seriously about and just want to add their traits that you like.  To be honest, I just think these kinds of tasks are more like fun little quizzes than actual decision assistance.

Let the Christmas Prep Begin

It seems like a lot of people like to complain about Christmas decorations and shopping happening earlier and earlier every year. Not me. I just love October, November, and December. I happen to like Halloween and Thanksgiving décor though, so I’ll wait until the beginning of December to start putting up the Christmas ones. There are a few Christmas things that I do like to start doing in November though – listening to Christmas music, preparing Christmas cards, and shopping.

The Christmas music has more to do with teaching my kids the songs. This year, I think we might go caroling at my mom’s work (the retirement home). Lexi and Jordan know quite a few songs, but it doesn’t hurt to get them down pat and learn a few more. I may even make a video of them singing to post on here in December.

As for the Christmas cards, I just like to send them off the beginning of December. In order to do that, I need to get a decent picture this month. That is the toughest part.  To make it easy, I will just order photo cards that I can pick up at the store. Next, comes addressing and stamping all of them. This whole process has to start this month in order for them to go out the first part of December. Now that I think about it, I’ll probably be putting that off this whole task for at least a week or two.

In reality, I just want to do the shopping. Unfortunately, funds are a little low this year.  I have been given a great coupon for this weekend though. It is for 30% off of Gap, Banana Republic, & Old Navy for as many times as I want to use it. I know someone who works for the Corporate Headquarters and they do this every year. The best part is that 5% of the purchases goes to the charity she picked, which is Big Brothers/Big Sisters. I love that one.

Shopping, Christmas cards, and Christmas music… how I love it all even in November.

Munchkin Houses

Have I mentioned that we are living on a small mountain?  It is a rather famous little mountain in San Diego for several reasons, but the main one is because there is a huge white cross on the very top that is a Veterans Memorial.  I posted a picture here: http://frecklefacegirl.blogspot.com/2009/08/views-near-our-house.html. 

There is a lesser known attraction on the mountain as well.  It is more of an Urban Legend.  I first heard the story about four years ago, when I came out to La Jolla to visit my mom.  She told me all about the "Munchkin Houses."  According to the legend, several little people that starred in the Wizard of Oz used their earnings to build small houses on Mount Soledad.  I immediately liked the story.  It just sounds cool, but I was skeptical because I had read a story about how the little people didn't get paid very well from the movie.  She even took me to see the houses:

They really are cute houses with small doors, steps, and gates. Supposedly, according to the legend, there were four original houses, but a few of them have been renovated for regular sized people. I decided to look it up on the internet recently. I read that it is just an Urban Legend.

That is probably true, but there has to be more to the story. It also said that the houses don't have smaller features. That part of the fact finding is wrong. Perhaps, they were not built for little people, but the doors, steps, gate, and a few other things are definitely not normal sized. It also says that the houses sit down from the road making them look smaller. That isn't true either. In fact, the second picture definitely shows that this one is quite higher than the road. I took this picture sitting in my vehicle, which is a crossover and fairly high off the ground.

While the story is interesting, the best part about the houses is how unique they are. I happen to like architecture, but these houses are special. They have inspired a whole Urban Legend for heaven sakes.

Turkey Day

Thanksgiving is probably my favorite holiday.  It is fun to get together with family or friends or both and just enjoy each others' company.  Of course, munching on great food is always nice too.  I even love hosting it.  This year, we don't have any exciting plans, but we are still looking forward to it.  Lexi and Jordan talk about Turkey Day all the time. 

Today, I wanted to give Lexi something to do that was quiet during Jordan's nap.  I handed her some paper and told her to draw a turkey.  I had no idea what it was going to look like.  We haven't been drawing or coloring turkeys this year.  A little later I went to see her drawing and was blown away.  She even drew a hat!  Some times I can't believe that she is still only four. 

Just Posting

This year, my blog has clearly been neglected. Too bad this isn't one of those situations where I can blame it on someone else. Not that I am into that, but knowing I could would be cool. Unfortunately, I have simply lost interest for the most part and for no tangible reasons. However, this month has been different. Some of you may be wondering if I joined the NaBloPoMo (http://www.nablopomo.com/). Well, I haven't.

For years, I have seen other blogs, which I follow, join and I have enjoyed their frequent posts. I always thought that there wasn't any way I could produce that many topics in one month. I also wondered if I would even have the motivation to try. Besides, I am not a blogger that comes up with a fascinating topic and adds lots of creative/humorous insight. I wish I could be like that. My posts are basically about a bunch of drivel on this and that. Sometimes, I don't even like my blog because I feel like I am much more pessimistic or negative on here than I really am. Perhaps, I just get inspired by negativity, which frankly sucks.

Anyway, see... blah, blah, blah about this and that. I guess this proves my point. If I keep up with my little quest of posting almost every day this month, you can be sure that there will be more randomness chatter about this and that. - Don't say you haven't been warned.

Sister Wives

Those of you who have read my blog for a while might remember that I liked the show Big Love.  I was fascinated by it at least for the first season and most of the second.  Sure there were times, when some of the topics bothered me, but it was all part of the drama. 

When the new reality show about polygamy came out recently on TLC, I was mildly interested.  I don't really get into many television shows, but I figured that I would watch and episode or two of Sister Wives.  However, I can't bring myself to watch even a minute of it.  I happened to catch an interview that they did on the Today Show before any of the episodes aired.  The whole thing just made me sick to my stomach.  I can't even watch the interview again.

Unlike the majority of Americans, I have seen several polygamists.  There are quite a few of them in Southern Utah.  In fact, on our way back from visiting friends last February, we happened to see 4 young wives in the restroom at the outlet mall in Saint George, Utah.  They are easy to spot because they really do dress like the women on the compound of the Big Love show.  They have big poufy hair, braids, and traditional dresses.  Even Lexi noticed that there was something unusual about them.  We exchanged polite smiles.  The ones on the compound are raised that way and are used to being so different. 

I have also known of a few that try harder to blend in with the general population.  They dress normal, don't live in compounds, and have regular jobs.  Whether they live on a compound or not, even in Utah, they are considered weird.  I actually have a tougher time understanding why the women living more normal lives would agree to be a sister wife.  After watching the Sister Wives interview on the Today Show, I just can't see how any woman could find it appealing.  The worst part though was when he talked about falling in love with one woman and then another and then another and then another.  He made it sound like he just had to have these women because he fell for them.  Please!  It sounds like he has a hormonal problem.  I am definitely skipping this one.

**I should note that polygamy is no longer practiced by members of the LDS church (aka Mormons).  When someone decides to become a polygamist, they are usually excommunicated.

Roots of Envy

Lately, quite a few friends have shared news with me that made me feel happy for them and GLAD it wasn’t me. Of course, my two recently divorced friends that got re-married were on the list. When one of them shared the news, the only thing that popped into my head was… “You actually have to plan a wedding for a second marriage? What a pain!” Thankfully, I kept that to myself.

The other bit of good news was from a friend that is pregnant and about to have her third. She has two sons, one six months younger than Lexi and the other one is a little younger than Jordan. I would have thought that this might bring about feelings of envy since I wanted three kids, but no. Mainly, I was glad not to be pregnant. That really is such a miserable and uncomfortable state. In the last year, I have come to realize that I am quite happy with my two kids. Don’t get me wrong, I love kids. I am just hoping that if I find a Mr. Right, that he will have a few young kids of his own.

Neither of these news flashes brought about feelings of envy, but there was some news from a friend about two months ago that hit hard. This friend had been offered a dream job with a ridiculously large salary in Italy. I would LOVE to live in Italy and quite a few other countries. I spent several days stuck in the pit of horrible envy (not the hateful kind, just the depressed & wished that was me kind).  Probably the worst part of it all was that the move wasn’t even wanted. How could that be? I just don’t get it.

To sum this up, marriage and pregnancy are not going to make me feel envious, but a life altering experience in a foreign country will. I guess some things never change.

Feeling Old

It is funny what things make a person feel old.  For the past several months, it has been the fact that someone I knew from Jr High, Shawn Lindsay, was running to be a State House Representative in Oregon.  It makes me feel even older than knowing that my 20 year high school reunion is next summer.  He won yesterday, so I can't continue to pretend that he was just way too young for this type of thing.

Predatory Dating

Since my divorce, I have come across several chics in similar situations that are handling it quite differently. I like to call their approach to being single – predatory dating. It is the way I describe people (mostly women) that make getting married a number one priority.

I know 4 chics that got divorced about the same time or a bit after I did. Most of them had very valid reasons for getting divorced, which makes me a little sad with the whole marriage thing.  All four of them have decided that they were going to get married again ASAP. It is like they are on some crazy mission. Two of them have succeeded so far. Another one is in a relationship with "the one." The last one, whose divorce wasn't finalized until the beginning of this summer, is dating up a storm. She goes out 3 - 5 times a week with different guys. I am guessing that it is only a matter of time for her.

I realize that predatory dating isn’t completely odd. Everyone knows someone that likes to jump from relationship to relationship with little down time. I honestly hope it works for all of them, but I worry that being in a hurry could lead to rash decisions. Like they say, “Permanent decisions should not be made on temporary feelings.” With such a deliberate agenda, how can they be sure that they are not making the same mistakes?

I guess jumping back into it might be healthier than going the other way like I am doing. I just can’t get excited about dating. How do single moms (especially full time moms like me) find the time or energy to even put themselves out there?