10 Week Countdown

When I was working, several of the younger girls asked me why I would want to go through pregnancy again knowing that it is uncomfortable and then very painful at the end. I told them that after being so uncomfortable for a while, you look forward to giving birth. It is not only about having a new baby, but moving out of the big belly stage. They seemed so fearful and fascinated that I had to point out that about half of the world's population is women. Most of them give birth at least once. Many of them go on to do it several times. It is part of life.

I am already at the stage where I am looking forward to giving birth. I have started watching "Birth Stories," A Baby Story," and "Bringing Home Baby," which I haven't done since I was pregnant with Lexi. I have also gone back to look at pictures and read what I wrote about giving birth to Lexi. I'll post it again for those feeling fascinated by this lately too:

Lexi's Birth Story

Thursday morning, we got up to go to the hospital. I had only slept 4 good hours and perhaps 1 more if you add up all the cat naps. I was just too excited. Steve seemed like he was taking forever. I made a breakfast burrito for him and packed our bags in his truck to speed things up as much as possible. He even wanted to stop at Starbucks to get himself a cup of coffee, but I told him I was just too insane right now for that. I was trying my best to act calm, but inside I was nuts. He was getting excited too, but was calm and wanted to live in the moment. I had tried to warn him the night before that I would be like this. Even if it had taken a total 1 minute to get there, I would have been crazy. I know how impatient/neurotic I can be about some things.

As soon as we got into the administrative office to sign papers, I was completely relaxed (which is how my crazy impatient-ness always goes). There was another couple in there and the wife was sitting in a wheel chair. She was already suffering from contractions and doing some of the breathing techniques. They started talking to us. I whispered to Steve not to tell her how dilated I was because she might be jealous that I am not in pain. They signed their papers and were sent to their room. We signed ours and were told to go to room 5, which was a mistake because that was their room. We were switched to 3 and the process began.

I changed into the gown (sounds so elegant). My doctor checked and found out that I was 5.5 cm dilated and everyone was amazed that I felt so good. My doc said that she was happy that I was being induced because without the pain, I could end up having the baby at home or in traffic on the way to the hospital. I was just happy that I had progressed to that level with virtually no pain. I started thinking about my grandma, Lorena (the one Lexi is named after), and about all the stories of her great tolerance for pain. I hoped that this would carry me throughout the birth, but knew better than to believe in it. It only took a few minutes for me to realize that was not going to be the case. Having my water break proved that. It was quick but agonizing. Plus, that was Steve's first ick moment. He handled it well.

The nurses hooked me up to the monitors, took blood, inserted the IV into my hand and started the pitocin drip. I started feeling the contractions right away and the pain gradually increased over the next few hours. Steve plugged in our CD player with a Sarah McLachlan CD to set a nice atmosphere. I have to admit that the contractions never got unbearable. When the nurse told me that I was dilated to 7 cm, I still said that I was ready for the epidural. I wanted to be able to relax before the pushing came. For some reason, I had a feeling that would be difficult. The anesthesiologist came in and sent Steve out. While they prepared and did the epidural, the anesthesiologist and nurse talked about how amazed they were that I didn't ever complain and was so calm. They decided that I just handle pain well and they wanted to clone me. I sat there not saying much and just kept thinking that things had been fine, but that this wasn't over yet.

I had the typical epidural story. Having the IV put in my hand hurt worse than the epidural or the catheter. Once it was in, Steve and I talked and joked for the next hour and a half. He told me that he wanted to run to his truck to get a Tums. I said that I was feeling something weird down there like I have to poop. He said he would be quick.

Right after he left (seconds), the doctor came in and said that I was dilated to 10 cm. They started setting up the room and I was anxiously waiting for Steve to return. He still wasn't back when they wanted me to start pushing. My doctor and nurse told me to grab my legs and they started cheering me on. We did the typical 3 sets of 10 seconds of pushing during contractions. We went through this twice before Steve got back. When he walked into the room, he looked a little frustrated and nervous about what he had missed. Apparently, he had been out in the hall trying to convince the security guard that his wife was in room 3 and not in room 5. It wasn't long before the next contraction started and he had to quickly join in by grabbing a leg and coaching on my right side.

The pushing went on for about 30 - 45 minutes with the doctor going to check on the woman in room 5. Then, the doctor came in and apologized because she had to perform an emergency C-Section. She told us that she called another doctor from her office to come and take over and that he would be here shortly. We all were listening, but as she turned around to walk out, Steve asked where she was going. I said to do the C-Section and he let out a big sigh of relief. He told us that he thought she was going to do an emergency C-Section on me. That explains why he suddenly looked so startled and nervous.

Anyway, the pushing continued and the other doctor showed up. Lexi actually moved down and crowned quickly, but then made little or no progress after that. He decided that they needed to turn off the epidural because he wanted me to push harder. He told me that it would take about an hour to wear off, but that I would get stronger & stronger as it did. That began what I consider as the next stage of pushing. The doctor pushed on my perineum to try to move delivery along. After several contractions, he told me that he needed to make a little more room for the baby to come out. I think that was a nice way of saying that I was getting an episiotomy. Unfortunately, I knew exactly what he was going to do.

We continued with the endless pushing and my original doctor came back to take over. She joked that the baby was waiting for her. By then, I was getting really tired and the epidural had disappeared. What could we do, but continue on? Everyone else in the room was getting excited. Steve had touched Lexi's head and was really into his role as coach. It didn't take long for the doc to say that I was pushing very well and she was surprised that I hadn't delivered already. She said that the cord must be wrapped around the baby's arm or leg. She pulled out the scissors and made even more room. By then, I was in so much pain that tears were rolling down my face. The nurse grabbed my hand and had me feel the top of Lexi's head. Even with that, I wasn't sure I could take any more of it, but I kept my mouth closed and pressed on. They all coached like crazy and her head finally popped out.

Although that was amazing progress, it didn't get any easier. I was fully bawling from the pain and each new step including delivering her shoulders and the rest of her body was excruciating. They plopped her on me and I barely had the awareness to care. The doctor announced that the delivery was so difficult because Lexi's umbilical cord was too short. She also said it was a good thing that Lexi wasn't born next week because the extra weight would have made an emergency C-Section probably the only option. Thank goodness, they induced me.

Next, I saw Steve cut the umbilical cord and he looked so happy. Unfortunately, I still had to deliver the placenta, which was fast, but horrible. Steve was torn between comforting me and wanting to look at Lexi, so I told him to go hold her. I was in agony as the doctor stitched me up. She took about 20 minutes. Steve looked down to see what was taking her so long. He held up his fingers to let me know that the cut was about 2". I asked the doctor how many stitches I was getting. She thoughtfully avoided the question and said it was several layers. Right then, I knew recovery was going to be hard.

I finally got to hold Lexi when the stitching was done. I removed the night gown and she latched on to my breasts fairly quickly. It was nice to be at that stage. I had her with me for about 30 minutes and then they took her to the nursery to be cleaned up and checked. I sent Steve with her. For 2 hours, I sat in the room trying to comprehend it all. My friend (Amanda), who was in the waiting room, came to talk to me. That was nice to have her there. We talked about all that happened, which I think was emotionally healthy for me.

Steve came back and we were transferred to one of the little rooms. Apparently, all the suites were full for the night. While lying in that room, I suddenly realized the extent of the pain of the stitches. I couldn't focus on anything, but the pain. I am not usually one to ask for things or complain, but I was at my wits' end. I called for the nurse to bring something to take the edge off. They called the pharmacy and got Motrin. They also gave me witch hazel pads and cream. It took a while to kick in, but the second I was able to think I suddenly became very sad that Lexi wasn't with us. I got up and made Steve walk me to the nursery to get her. They wheeled her to us and we headed back to our room. As I gingerly sat on the bed and held her, I felt a love that I never thought imaginable. My heart swelled and hasn't been the same since.

Pink Ribbons Galore

Tomorrow is Houston’s Race for the Cure. I have participated in the Miami events for the past several years and have really enjoyed them. In fact, I am quite sad that I will not be doing the Houston one this year. I love walking and running, but a 5k feels a little too difficult this late in pregnancy (in my next life I’ll make sure I am younger when I have kids).

Beyond feeling like this is a good cause, I have been hit with news about breast cancer twice this week. The mother of one of my closest friends passed away. She had a double mastectomy 17 years ago. That was only the beginning. From then until now, her cancer battle has been nonstop. She has been the strongest fighter I have ever and probably will ever know. Her will to live completely boggles my mind. I can’t even fathom the pain, treatments, and heartbreaking news that she has encountered for that long. Doctors had written her off so many times that her family couldn’t even keep count. My heart breaks for my friend and her family and all they have been through including losing her.

This week, I also got a letter from my grandmother informing me that my aunt (dad’s sister) was just diagnosed with breast cancer. The letter wasn’t very informative, but my grandmother lives in her own little world in the mountains of Idaho. I doubt she understands much about cancer or the stages. Basically, she said she is praying that my aunt lives for quite a while rather than go quickly like my dad. The sad thing is that I don't think she has anyone to take care of her in anyway no matter if she only needs a simple procedure or more radical treatment. It will not be easy.

While I will not be physically participating tomorrow, my heart will be at the 5k. I will just have to nibble on pink M&Ms this year. Next year though, I will be there in full force with the jogging stroller and actually running for the cure.

Hibernating Hermit

I am not quite sure how or why it has happened, but upon my return from Virginia I have morphed into hibernating hermit. Yes, I am a bit of a shut-in. Sure, we have gone out, but during the week (without Steve) it mostly consists of hour-long morning walks and quick trips to the grocery store. This certainly isn’t normal for me considering that I usually get cabin fever within half a day. I have been thinking about the reasons for me to act so out of character and I have come up with a few.

First, I feel like I have been pregnant for years. I have heard that the second pregnancy feels longer, but I don’t think my back or belly realizes that there was a break between Lexi’s birth and this pregnancy. I wish they would stop sending complaints to my brain. There is nothing I can do about it, so shut up! ...and, what is with the sharp pains shooting up from my tailbone? I don’t really care for those.

Second, it is now October. I would really like to experience a day when the temperature doesn’t hit 90+. I want to do outside activities, but the third trimester and heat just don’t mix well. I have even found a bunch of different festivals and fall events that look fun in decent weather. I have made it a new habit to check the 10 day forecast on weather.com almost every day. Please weather gods give this pregnant Houstonian a break soon before I am just too big to enjoy it.

Third, Lexi came back with a cold. It isn’t that big of a deal unless you consider that most of my friends have new babies. There is no way that I want to subject them to that, because they’ll probably want to return the favor in a few months. I would rather avoid it.

I think this streak is going to have to end soon though. The longer we stay inside the more wound up Lexi gets and the more exhausted that makes me. Help... I have fallen and I can’t get up! Next week, I will work on crawling out of this huge hole I have somehow dug during my lazy streak.

Baby Spacing

About a month ago, I walked into Michaels and saw a mother of a 9 month old that looked about 9 months pregnant. All I could think was that her kids are going to be REALLY close in age. I started shopping and forgot about it until I got to the check out. The lady behind me asked how old Lexi was and then commented that my kids will be close in age. I just laughed.

The strange thing is that I get this reaction quite often. I have always thought that 2 – 3 years was normal. Lexi and Jordan will be 23 months apart. I guess I must ask...what is the average? Am I off my rocker here? I certainly don’t have to fit within the norm. I decided to have another baby because I was ready. I would just like to know if ALL these people are lunatics or if I am. Usually, when they say that, I just laugh and say that I got a late start so there is no time to hold off.

Lazy Photo Day

So, I am Crazy…Or Lucky, Probably Both

I just came back from a long weekend in Virginia. Before going, people thought the scenario was either humorous or a bit insane. I guess it isn’t very often that a pregnant chic drags herself and a toddler half way across the country to spend time with her husband’s relatives while he is stuck attending a work seminar. This was an important trip though because his dear sweet Granny was celebrating her 90th birthday. Plus, I happen to like his family. I would even venture to say that I feel closer to them then he does, at least his cousins (The Boss, The Crazy Bow Lady, & The Princess).

Unfortunately for me, I could not find a direct flight from Houston to DC for a reasonable price. We flew to Dallas, had a two hour layover, and then had a 3 hour flight to Dulles. I probably should have bought a separate ticket for Lexi, but the fact that she still qualifies as a lap baby means I don’t have to spend the extra money so I didn’t. We squished my big pregnant belly & her little body into a crammed aisle seat on each flight. I would bet that the people sitting around us cringed when they imagined how the flight would be. She did very well though. She had everyone eating out of the palm of her hand. Other than being extremely uncomfortable and struggling with my luggage before check-in, it was far from my worst nightmares about what it could have been.

Our two days in Virginia were great. Granny’s little town is so charming. I think there are a total of 2 stop lights. The streets are lined with houses that are at least 200 years old. Everyone knows everyone and is so neighborly and kind. I think it is the perfect place to have a vacation home. I would especially love to go during my favorite season, Fall. By the way, before leaving I saw that the county she lives in is ranked in the top 10 places to see fall leaves. We were a bit too early for that though.

It was in this little town that the big Birthday Bash was held. Almost 150 people came to celebrate her life, friendship, and all the charity work she has accomplished. We were all involved in different ways. The Boss made a beautiful & very tasty cake that could rival any wedding cake I have seen. The Crazy Bow Lady did the best imitation of Granny. She had friends and family rolling on the floor. The Princess designed the invitations and was the MC for the night. I even participated by making the programs and reading a poem. The great grandkids greeted people and passed out the cake. Several of her friends mentioned that they hope their families will make such a big deal for their 90th birthdays. We all wish we could be so healthy and active for that long.

The whole visit was great. I felt spoiled with everyone helping me take care of Lexi and our bags. Plus, coming from a big family, you can bet that I love the commotion that ensues. The only thing I would have changed was how short the trip was and how many pictures I took. I had planned on taking a million and only ended up with a few. I didn’t even get pictures of everyone, so I guess I will have to beg the others for copies of theirs.

Basically, it was too fun, too short, and it will be too long until I see them again because I am done traveling for a while (until after the baby is born).

The Key To A Happy Marriage?

Several days ago, someone told me that her mom gave her the best advice ever. That advice?... "Never put your kids before your husband."

She said it with such sincerity and a longing for her mother who had passed away, so I just politely smiled. What I wanted to say was, “Are you serious because that sounds so 50ish?”

Fortunately, in this case, I know that this does not include a stand by your man whether he is a monster or not. Despite that, it is still hard for me to embrace this concept. Marriage is between two adults (well one woman & a man that needs some training). Both partners should be able to take care of themselves for the most part, where as a child has very real demands that can be quite time consuming. Just saying NEVER put your kids before your husband seems impractical.

I realize that it is easy to get wrapped up in motherhood and life. These things can take a lot out of a woman and leave her with little energy or enthusiasm for her husband. Romance and friendship that should exist in a marriage need to be kept alive. I am not a marriage expert, but I would like to think of it as more of a partnership. It is about going through life together. If you can keep your relationship strong, hopefully you’ll have someone there helping you with the kids.

Talking Toddler

I like to go on walks with Lexi. Whenever the temperature isn’t blistering hot, I stick her in the stroller and we walk around neighborhoods and often to a park. Her favorite part, besides the park, is pointing and shouting out the names of things including cool (school) bus, big truck, coi (car), tree, two tree, mushroom, outside wall, grass, dog, kitty cat, window, door, smell good (flowers), people, etc.

This morning, (thanks to Hurricane Humberto to the east) the weather was perfect. We headed out with the normal excitement, especially since it was school bus time. As we were walking around, I couldn’t help but wonder why some people had been watering their lawns given that it rains almost every day here. Lexi was in her own little world and I was in mine, when suddenly I slipped on some muddy water on the sidewalk. My knee twisted a little, but I didn’t go all the way down thanks to the stroller. I glanced around and nobody was out to see me, which is always nice.

As we were walking away, Lexi announced, “Momma fall down!” Then, she was gracious enough to repeat it over & over & over. She even told everyone we met. I just laughed. I had to call Steve & let her say it to him on the phone, which she kindly obliged. As we were nearing the end of our walk, we came up to more water on the sidewalk. This time she said, “No Fall! No Fall! No Fall!” Good thing I am not completely shy and embarrassed about these things, but it would be nice for it to go unnoticed. I can see that this is the start of many more fun announcements.

Scheduled Birth

Friday, I had another OB appointment and ultrasound. I didn't have any big expectations. The software for my scanner is giving me problems, so I will not be able to post the picture. It looks a lot like the last one. BTW, it is still definitely a boy.

When the doctor sat down with me, she asked me the general questions like which hospital I want to deliver in & if I want an epidural (YES!). Then being me, I took the opportunity to drive home the fact that I want to be induced. She told me that she likes to plan ahead too & said we should schedule it now. I was a bit caught off guard because I didn't know she'd be willing to schedule this far in advance. Well - it looks like baby boy is going to be born on December 20th, unless he has earlier plans of course. It actually feels great to have a date in mind.

With This Baby

I have been thinking about the differences with this pregnancy and the last one. When a person is pregnant the first time, it is easy to get wrapped up in thoughts, feelings, and movements of the baby. Everything else (big or small) takes a back seat. Besides the emotional and physical aspects, there is so much preparation, shopping, and getting the nursery set-up.

The second pregnancy is much different. I have been through this all before. My bodily changes are not new and neither are the baby’s movements. Plus, the nursery is set-up and we basically have everything we NEED. So far, I have bought boy clothes and an old fashioned rocking chair, which I have been wanting since I was pregnant with Lexi. There are a few things I want/plan to get like this tandem jogging stroller, a bottle of gripe water, and blue pacifiers. When I think back to my preparations last time, there are some purchases I would have changed. Instead of getting the entire matching set of baby stuff from Graco (stroller, carrier, pack-n-play, swing, high chair, & diaper bag), I would have nixed the swing (likes it more now than she did as an infant), bought a stylish diaper bag, and gone with Combi for the stroller/carrier. I probably had more fun shopping for the matching stuff though.

During this pregnancy, I feel like I am mostly working on preparing Lexi for the transition. I will be using the next few months to get her used to a toddler bed, potty trained (hopefully), and being a tad more independent. She has already made big steps in becoming more comfortable with me holding babies. When we first got to Texas, I held my friend’s baby in a carrier (not so snuggly) & Lexi began screaming like an insanely jealous person. Now, I can hold and comfort the baby without it bothering her. Hopefully, by December, she will even be excited to have one around full time.

Of course, the new baby is always in the back of my mind, but it isn’t my main focus. Sometimes, I wonder if I should feel guilty about that, but I have too many things dividing my attention. It is just the fate of the non-oldest kids.